I am starting to try to see myself more like my grandmother than my mother everyday.
I know that she never had much money, but somehow managed to raise 7 kids during the depression, she never raised her voice at them according to my mom, and still my memories of her all revolve around the flowers in her garden and her love of children. I am trying to channel some of her loves for gardening and being a gentle force around my children more these days.

I fear so much in myself lately, so I am looking to her example through the bits I still have, to become someone different and stronger after all of this.